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will boost your ratings. Look, gay men aren t stupid. They know damn well you have to play the straight
game.
Carl stepped out of his jeans and into a pair of black slacks.  Do we? Carl asked seriously.  Do we
really have to play it?
 I am so confused my head hurts. Keith tucked his shirt in as he stepped into leather loafers.
 There are no easy answers. Melvin fixed Keith s shirt collar.
 Oh no, Carl replied sarcastically,  there are plenty of easy answers, just no sane ones.
When they had finished dressing, Melvin drew both of their attention.  Follow your heart.
 And lose your career, Carl added.
 Maybe not. Carl, it s becoming a new trend in Hollywood. Men are braving the backlash and
stepping up to the plate.
Carl glanced at Keith for his response.
 And, Mel announced,  the more men there are who do come out? The easier it will get.
 I m no sacrificial lamb, Carl argued.  Let someone else risk life and limb.
Mel shrugged.  It s your decision. No one can make it but you. Before they headed to Ken for their
make-up, Mel prompted,  But if you think having headlines in the tabloids about your fake women is
helping your popularity? Think again.
71
Thanking Mel under his breath, Carl walked beside Keith to a waiting Ken. Silent as they were
powdered and their hair was brushed, Carl couldn t rid the sinking feeling in his gut. Maybe this should
never have happened in the first place. He and Keith should have remained friends and never crossed the
line from make-believe to reality. It was a mistake. The ruin to their careers was looming like a
thundercloud over a picnic.
Finally, on their way to the set and a waiting Charlotte and crew, Carl tried to remember his lines.
With the distraction of the outside world beating him down, acting was becoming as difficult as lying to
himself.
Seeing Charlotte s tired expression, Carl knew the decisions he and Keith were making affected
everything around them, including their performance and the longevity of their hit show.
 Okay, Charlotte stated, certainly not with her usual zeal,  we ll do a camera rehearsal. Go get in
place.
Carl moved to his spot on the set, shaking his body to loosen it up as if he were about to sprint in a
race. He forced himself to get into character.
Keith was devastated. He thought Adam knew the right thing to do for his career, and Keith was
positive Adam was looking out for his future. But& at what expense? If he was exposed as a fraud to the
public wasn t that worse than just coming out?
Struggling to remember his lines for the upcoming scene, Keith had to stop thinking about the
problems they had and focus.
 Living room scene. Camera rehearsal. Action!
Spinning around, Keith gazed at Carl.  It s not my fault! Blame your meddling mother!
 My mother? You re the one who outted us at the party, Dennis. I told you it was risky to kiss
anywhere that wasn t private.
Keith s expression softened. He closed the gap between them and held Carl s hands.  I couldn t help
it, Troy. Do you know how hard it is to pretend I don t love you?
 I know, Dennis. Carl withdrew one hand so he could caress Keith s cheek.
Keith embraced Carl, connecting their hips.  I hate lying. I hate pretending we re not a couple.
 Me too. I just don t see a way out of this alive, Dennis.
72
Just the contact of their bodies sent Keith s cock vertical. He couldn t prevent the love and attraction
he and Carl shared. Why should he try to stop loving him? Wanting him?
 I do. Keith pressed his dick against Carl, craving him to feel how hard he had gotten.  Let s just
bare ourselves in public. Throw caution to the wind. Other men have done it, other men have survived.
 That s easier said than done. Carl rubbed his erection against Keith s, obviously knowing Keith
yearned for the turn on.
 No. It s easier done.
Carl cradled the back of Keith s head and drew him to his lips.
The touch of their mouths sent shivers all over Keith s body. Taking their time, making it count,
Keith made damn sure their tongue kiss was visible for the camera. Parting after a long moment, Keith
whispered,  We have nothing to be ashamed of, Troy. How can love be wrong or embarrassing?
 You re so brave, Dennis. I don t know if I can do it.
Keith smoothed his hand down Carl s back to his ass, cupping it affectionately.  Do it with me.
Carl swung Keith up into his arms, holding him like a baby. Keith wrapped around Carl s neck,
sucking at his mouth as Carl dipped them sensually. When they parted lips, Carl hissed,  For you, I
would do anything.
 Good. Then it s settled.
Carl carried Keith to their bedroom set.
 Cut!
Once the scene ended, Carl set Keith on his feet. The moment he did, Keith looked back at the
cameras to see Charlotte s reaction.  Carl. Who are those men?
Carl spun to look.  Shit. The producer, Derek Dixon, and co-producer, Will Markham. Carl reached
back and gave Keith s hand a quick squeeze in support.
Charlotte went over some corrections for the cameras as the men waited. Keith didn t catch eyes with
either of the big wigs. He d never seen them at a taping before and had a feeling their presence was a
direct reaction to the tabloids running the story of his and Carl s new model girlfriends. Charlotte s
warning rang out in his head.
 Okay. Again. Get into position.
Seeing Charlotte s pinched expression, Keith knew he and Carl weren t the only ones under pressure.
The buck stopped with Charlotte.
73
 Living room scene. First taping. Take one. Action!
After two more attempts they had completed the scene to Charlotte s satisfaction. Keith followed
Carl to the refreshment table before anyone could say anything to them. Charlotte was having a private
conversation with the two producers behind the cameras.
 You realize we re in for another lecture. Carl sipped from a bottle of water.
 I do. Carl, you tell me what the right thing to do is.
 I have no clue.
 I want to come out. I honestly do, Carl. I want us to be able to go to the awards ceremonies hand in
hand. I want us to go to gay bars if we want to. I also want to show our support for the gay community.
But.
 But. Carl knew, Keith didn t have to reiterate it.
 Gentlemen?
Keith spun around. The imposing producers of their show were standing behind them.
Immediately, Carl reached out his hand for a shake.  Mr. Dixon, Mr. Markham, so nice to see you.
Keith had never met them before but he certainly knew them by their reputation.  Sir. He extended
his hand and repeated to each,  Nice to finally meet you.
 Can we have a word? Derek gestured to a private room off of the set.
Gulping the rest of his juice to get rid of the glass, Keith s nerves kick in. It felt like a reprimand at
school and he was about to get scolded by the principal.
Carl opened a door to a room Keith had never entered previously. It was pitch dark until Carl lit the
overhead light. A table surrounded by chairs filled the space. Once the four of them had entered, Will
closed the door for complete privacy. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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