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Unnoticed, the dog s muzzle had been contracting back into a human mouth,
while displaced bones and tissue flowed upwards. Soon Foobert wore his regular
human head, upon a dog s body. And he could speak, again.
Oughtn t I to change back right now? I mean, I ll need hands if I m going to
help gag this Hogan. Not paws. It ll be a whole lot easier pushing a
wheelchair, too, if I have upright posture.
Mentamorpha was shocked to see the Doberman-man peering at her. This was
ridiculously indiscreet.
She cried, Heel! It was all she could think of, for the moment.
Obeying her command, Foobert began doggily trotting over.
For Christ s sake, Foobert, I don t mean heel like that! I mean, not now
! I mean, get your head straightened out!
Uh?
If Pastethorpe sees a total stranger in here
But at that moment the door opened unannounced and, uninvited, in came &
Foobert promptly turned tail, like the most cowardly guard dog ever seen.
Diving under the desk, he hid his human head behind a waste bucket.
& in came a grizzly, granite-faced, white-haired man. His big flashing teeth
were a veritable piano keyboard. He wore an impeccably tailored denim suit,
with a shirt the pink and white of striped toothpaste.
Hogan s mouth sagged briefly (a silent crashing of chords) as he spied the
Doberman, equally briefly.
Then he caught sight of Mentamorpha. His mind rejected what he had glimpsed
while Foobert scuttled for cover. Instead, his gaze photographed the seductive
secretary, though not in X-ray style. In spite of her long modest skirt and
stout brogues, she looked more like a casino pet than someone born again in
the
Lord. And yet & and yet, decided Hogan, there was a certain aura of moral
rigour about the woman, as though she really had drunk at the fountain of the
Apostle. Maybe Pastethorpe was mistaken in his suspicions. Yet surely friend
Drew was acting naively, to say the least?
Ah, a good man might well appear naive to others who are less good!
Hogan closed the door behind him, admitting no one else. He strode to the
desk.
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Blessings in the Lord, Brother Drew!
Drew Hayes half-rose, then waved hastily at a large chair with shiny steel
arms and legs, and a sagging leather seat.
Blessings, blessings! he bleated. His blue eyes wetly implored Jake to park
himself.
Puzzled, Jake diverted himself towards the chair and thumped his bulk into it.
The chair emitted an almost human groan.
Jake glanced significantly towards the secretary, dismissing her from the
presence of the Apostles so they could get down to the real business, man to
man. But as though she completely misunderstood the message, the woman moved
behind his chair instead. Her hands were twitching about as though she wanted
to massage the travel fatigue out of the neck and shoulders of Drew s most
righteous buddy, as a family service. This rather confirmed Jake s earlier
fears.
Drew stood up and circled round the desk. He poised himself beaming before
Jake. His huge hands were playing with a lady s scarlet silk scarf. (The scarf
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of a Harlot! Jake revised his opinion steeply downhill.)
Now, Fred! Take him!
The steel chair arms writhed up and wrapped themselves around Jake s wrists.
The chair legs manacled his ankles. As Jake opened his mouth to cry out, the
masseuse behind him threw one arm around his throat, choking him. With her
other hand she seized his hair, tugging his head back. Drew stuffed the
scarlet scarf into Jake s open mouth, and began to fasten it tightly.
Yet Jake was not staring pop-eyed because of impending strangulation. He was
staring because the
Doberman had just at this moment emerged from under the desk and the great
black dog hadahumanhead
.
As the dog joined with the human couple and the animated chair in suppressing
him, Jake uttered weird noises the like of which he had never heard issue from
his mouth before.
The black dog with the human head was, of course, none other than the Devil.
Jake fought back valiantly. But the Devil Dog and the possessed couple and the
chair, between them, forced his hands and then his feet together, to bind them
with plastic cord. This done, Hayes shot the bolt on the door of his sanctum.
At any instant, Jake expected a flaming pit to open in the midst of the
Tientsin carpet. But what actually happened next was far less explicable.
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The Devil Dog drew back. He pranced upright, boxing the air with his paws. His
human lips parted in a canine snarl.
I m joined, he barked. The second tribe s joined! Stand by me, Fred!
The chair was no longer gripping Jake, now that he was bound. It shuddered
mightily beneath him. With one great convulsion it tossed his bound, gagged
body off on to the carpet, severely winding him.
Lying gasping on his side, Jake noticed that the chair now possessed wheels.
Which it hadn t, when he first sat in it. On these wheels it propelled itself
towards Drew Hayes, bowling him over. Apparently forgetful of the fact that it
had a human head, the Devil Dog bared its teeth and leapt upon Hayes, biting
him in his right hand.
Yow! yelped Hayes.
Circling around smartly, the chair extruded one of its steel arms. This now
terminated in a crudely fashioned metal hand. With this steel hand the chair
began to throttle Hayes, while the dog held him down with its teeth.
What s with you guys? cried the secretary. Lord, this is a
Shame upon the Sanctum! Foobert, heel
! Fred
Fantazios, just you quit it!
She threw herself upon the dog. Releasing its grip on Hayes, the dog rolled
over and slashed at the secretary with its powerful paws, tearing her long
skirt from her body. Naked from the waist down, she battled on for a few
seconds more, then hastily retreated round the desk. Yanking a heavy stainless
steel cross from the wall, she brandished it.
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